I think the most noble job in the world would have to be the Secret Service. That's your job - take a bullet for your boss. It's pretty intense, especially with this President. I'm pretty sure they're waking up in the morning, "He said what?!? Naw, Im fuckin' not goin' in today. Seriously. How many sick days do we get? Let's use them." Of course, in this scenario the Secret Service live in a dormitory... And they talk to each other before they go to work...
I'd like to think that I possess the characteristics to be in the Secret Service, but I'm really scared that question number one on the application is "Are you a pussy?" I'd circle "Yes." Then they'd be like, "Oh okay, well then you have to work at Coldstone." Well then, Dollar Dollar Tip!!! Tip Tip Hooray!!! I don't know the songs yet, but I'll learn them. I just can't wait to get the forearms. God I love that place.
Do you know that? You know if you tip them, they'll sing? There's like five different songs they'll sing. I know it, cause I walked in there with a wad of cash and I made it rain. Sing motherfucker, siiinnnggg! Make you re-evaluate every decision you've ever made! "Make it rain" That's such a great expression — thank you rappers. That's basically when you throw cash on the hoes... Pretty cool... I came up with my own. I like to make it hail. That's when you throw change at sluts. "Ow, ah, stop we- were those quarters?!!" Yea, I'm a baller on a budget.
